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A.F.S. 1984
03-17-2011, 10:27 PM
I like writing, and I have noticed that others on the forum also like to write. I believe that it would be benificial to have a thread that is dedicated to writing. If you want to post some of your work for constructive criticisms, this is the place to do it. If you have run out of ideas this is the place to discuss. Hopefully this goes well...

Some ground rules:
Link to your work on an external site.
Please do not post anything that you will regret later.
Please do not steal work.
If this is for something official (such as school or work) be clear on the guidelines of the assignment before you ask for help/ critiques. This is to prevent a situation of cheating on an assignment when your boss/teacher does not want you to obtain any help.
Please be constructive

I will start.
http://www.facebook.com/note.php?created&&note_id=1798446693230#!/note.php?note_id=1798446693230
I like to write nonfiction verses fiction so it will probably be boring but its got to start somewhere.

Let me know if the link does not work.

Volnixshin
03-18-2011, 12:26 AM
I'm writing a detective/super anti hero story about the Scorpion set to Spider-Man Noir

The Scorpion (http://volnixshin.deviantart.com/gallery/?offset=48#/d2mpjej)

A.F.S. 1984
03-18-2011, 12:42 AM
I'm writing a detective/super anti hero story about the Scorpion set to Spider-Man Noir

The Scorpion (http://volnixshin.deviantart.com/gallery/?offset=48#/d2mpjej)

Cool. There is alot more that can be done with fiction verses non fiction. Not as many rigid rules to be followed.

For what its worth, the story sounds good. I can picture the scene going on in my head and the voices of the characters as they speak.

definitely a good start.

Cadmium Polyphony
03-18-2011, 09:55 PM
I actually have a fairly recent published work, but the piece is lost in a sea of other published archived writers on the publisher's main site, so meh.

I've got articles scattered around the net, but I'm sure they've been taken down by now, for decency reasons, of course.

BsWN
03-19-2011, 07:06 PM
I'm writing a peice of original fiction, but it's not posted anywhere. Only the prelude on my dA, Rozalina's Butterfly (http://beyondswaraningyo.deviantart.com/gallery/?offset=0#/d3684rc). In the beginning it's about a girl named Dante who was kidnapped by a woman named Rozalina, she is then found and brought back to her family, but she runs away to Rozalina's friend Izabell, with the condition to stay away from Izabell's brother Sasha.... And I don't want to ruin the rest....

A.F.S. 1984
03-19-2011, 08:41 PM
I'm writing a peice of original fiction, but it's not posted anywhere. Only the prelude on my dA, Rozalina's Butterfly (http://beyondswaraningyo.deviantart.com/gallery/?offset=0#/d3684rc). In the beginning it's about a girl named Dante who was kidnapped by a woman named Rozalina, she is then found and brought back to her family, but she runs away to Rozalina's friend Izabell, with the condition to stay away from Izabell's brother Sasha.... And I don't want to ruin the rest....

This is, I think, a great start. In my opinion you are good at descriptions, you are good at conveying feelings to the reader in first person, and you are good at describing what is hapening to the character. Something that I believe will be better developed though, with more practice, is to establish a balance between all three.

The first person narrative is one of the hardest stories to write and it is an ambitious endeavor to undertake.

I cant wait to read more when you get it finished.

Amanita
03-19-2011, 10:44 PM
Now, this is just an intro to a story I'm working on, it's nowhere near finished.

http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=74334.msg1743404#msg1743404

Before you read any further, I will offer the warning that the story will deal with 9/11 and its aftermath. (Although the above intro doesn't mention it specifically, as it hasn't happened yet) You see, since years before that event, I've been doing writing and artwork personifying skyscrapers and other large structures, like cranes, ships, and bridges. I've essentially concieved a parallel universe where the living manifestations of these great structures walk the earth alongside us. This being a parallel universe, some things are different, but many other things happen there just as they happen here.
In the end, I decided that given the subject matter and characters I work with, events like 9/11 were going to come up sooner or later, and as tough or touchy as the subject matter is, it would be better to honestly deal with it, instead of pretending it never happened, or dancing around it, like the 900lb gorrilla in the room that nobody is willing to talk about.
I'm reminded of all the tv shows set in NYC, and how they handled that real-life event. Some shows mentioned it in passing, while others wove it into their storylines (Third Watch in particular). I think "Friends" pretty much pretended that it never happened, but with the relentlessly upbeat and chipper mood of that show, I think the writers realized that there was no way they could weave 9/11 into their storyline without it either totally killing the mood of the show, or coming across as trite and contrived.

A.F.S. 1984
03-20-2011, 01:15 AM
Its strange, at least for me, the most used key on my keyboard when writing is the backspace key. By like a factor of about 75%.

Also, I encourage yall to read each others work and offer feedback.

Cadmium Polyphony
03-20-2011, 01:57 AM
Its strange, at least for me, the most used key on my keyboard when writing is the backspace key. By like a factor of about 75%.

Also, I encourage yall to read each others work and offer feedback.

You encourage it, but do the authors?

Because I've read everything posted, and have opinions, but I dont feel it prudent to voice them without the consent of the authors themselves, rather than the facilitator of their exposure.

Amanita
03-20-2011, 02:20 AM
Well, if people didn't want feedback, they wouldn't post. Although there is a difference between feedback and flames. Not that you're the flaming sort, Cadmium.

Cadmium Polyphony
03-20-2011, 02:22 AM
Well, if people didn't want feedback, they wouldn't post.

Not entirely true. Often, people promote themselves seeking validation as feedback, rather than constructive criticism.

A.F.S. 1984
03-20-2011, 12:39 PM
You encourage it, but do the authors?

Because I've read everything posted, and have opinions, but I dont feel it prudent to voice them without the consent of the authors themselves, rather than the facilitator of their exposure.

I dont mind opinions given on anything I post. I cant speak for others that post. That is the reason I started this thread. Be mindful of the rules though. Please phrase it in such a way to avoid any conflicts, and offer suggestions for how an author can improve their work verses just saying it sucks.

A.F.S. 1984
03-20-2011, 12:58 PM
Now, this is just an intro to a story I'm working on, it's nowhere near finished.

http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=74334.msg1743404#msg1743404

Before you read any further, I will offer the warning that the story will deal with 9/11 and its aftermath. (Although the above intro doesn't mention it specifically, as it hasn't happened yet) You see, since years before that event, I've been doing writing and artwork personifying skyscrapers and other large structures, like cranes, ships, and bridges. I've essentially concieved a parallel universe where the living manifestations of these great structures walk the earth alongside us. This being a parallel universe, some things are different, but many other things happen there just as they happen here.
In the end, I decided that given the subject matter and characters I work with, events like 9/11 were going to come up sooner or later, and as tough or touchy as the subject matter is, it would be better to honestly deal with it, instead of pretending it never happened, or dancing around it, like the 900lb gorrilla in the room that nobody is willing to talk about.
I'm reminded of all the tv shows set in NYC, and how they handled that real-life event. Some shows mentioned it in passing, while others wove it into their storylines (Third Watch in particular). I think "Friends" pretty much pretended that it never happened, but with the relentlessly upbeat and chipper mood of that show, I think the writers realized that there was no way they could weave 9/11 into their storyline without it either totally killing the mood of the show, or coming across as trite and contrived.

Good artwork. I wish that I had enough time to sit down and try to learn computer generated artwork.

As for the story, it seems to be a very interesting concept. Where I would take it if I were writing would be more towards the short story side of things verses trying to create a novel around those types of characters. Perhaps a philosophical debate on the evils of religion or something. Another story along those lines would be a debate concerning the evils and dangers of technology. Perhaps with the the side for technology being like the a personification of wall street or something. And maybe the the side against technology being personified to represent the nuclear reactor in japan or something.

Ehh i dont know. just a thought

LostLittleWitch
03-20-2011, 01:55 PM
I write quite a bit, but I never post my work online, since I'm afraid of plagiarism. I mostly write fiction, and my current main work in progress is a story about a group of revolutionaries trying to start a revolution in their country, and establish a new government. It was heavily inspired by my history class from when we studied the Age of Revolution, and the Age of Imperialism. I also have another work in progress that's a fantasy-esque story about these little creatures I made up, and their quest to stop a power-hungry tyrant from destroying their world.

Amanita
03-20-2011, 02:00 PM
I am actually planning to do a longer piece based on this- the timeline not only covers the day of 9/11 itself, but a period of several months afterward. I have done shorter stories, but this particular one is going to be longer. And it won't be just skyscraper and bridge-incarnates, there's a few humans in there too. In some ways, these steelfolk can seem alien, in other ways surprisingly human, and that's going to figure into this piece. Likewise the theme of relations between the city's human and steelfolk. Some long-simmering racial tensions come to the surface, and this is something both sides have to deal with. Will this tragedy bring them closer together, or push them apart? Add to that a handful of grieving relatives who blame skyscrapers for the loss of their loved ones*, and things could get real interesting, real fast.

*IRL, this actually happened. I've heard quotes from 9/11 family members, such as "Two buildings murdered 3,000 people" and "I don't ever want to see the towers that murdered my husband!"
IRL, statements like that fuel only the fires of debate concerning skyscraper safety and structural integrity. But in a world where the buildings are living beings, such talk could have vastly different repercussions.

BTW, Thanks for the compliment for my artwork. Poser's great for my more human-looking characters, but for the skyscraper-folk, that's still a "draw by hand and colour in photoshop" process.