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Akiko Ki
12-17-2003, 06:19 PM
I have finished another Skit idea and I want to know what others think about it. This would be my first year doing a Mascrade for myself adn I want ot know what you all think.

Eleryth
12-17-2003, 08:31 PM
Well, to get our opinions, you should post it. :) I don't know about the others, but my mindreading ability sure ain't that good. :D

Akiko Ki
12-17-2003, 08:39 PM
ok Take in to affect that my brother is only 12 ok and he is Sano
*********************************************

( Skuld and Belldandy come in)

Skuld:: Keiichi is supposed to meet us here. Where is he (paces back and forth)?

Belldandy:: I am no sure where he is Skuld (watches Skuld pace)

(Sano comes in)

Belldandy and Skuld:: You're not Keiichi!

Sano:: (shrugs) I know, He took the day off.

Skuld:: (pokes Sano) I don't like you all ready.

Belldandy:: Now Skuld be nice, but he dose look a little mean so just be careful and don't feed him.

Skuld:: (still poking him) You are a little short ya know.

Sano:: (just stands there)

Belldandy:: He is kind of short to be Keiichi's replacement (walks up to measurer height)

Sano:: Would you 2 knock it off (stomps foot)?

Skuld:: (stops poking him after he yells) Someone has a temper problem.

Sano:: (glares at Skuld) I do not you little brat

Skuld:: (sticks out tongue)

Belldandy:: There is no need to be angry. This world is a world of love and peace.

Skuld:: (sits down with your head resting in your hands) Here we go again.

Belldandy:: This Earth is full of

Sano:: (Interrupts) Ok enough you are like a social studies teacher. Boring as

Belldandy:: There is no need for such languages here there are people that don't need to hear that from you.

Skuld:: ( Falls over anime style) Oh what's happening is she finally done. I must have dozed off for a sec.

Sano:: How can Keiichi stand to be with you 2?

Skuld:: You mean 3, Urd is on a trip right now.

Sano:: Whatever, The little brat over there is annoying and gets on my nerves too much ( points to Skuld who is picking her noise) And then we have her sister who is all Peace and love. Snore

Belldandy:: You are very rude I think we need to teach you a lesson ( grabs staff)

Skuld:: Alright ( grabs hammer and stands up)

( Both girls have evil smiles)

Sano:: Ya right you to beat Zanza don't make me laugh. Oh wait I am ( laughs)

Belldandy and Skuld:: Fine you don't want to take us serious

Belldandy:; Ready Skuld!

Skuld:: I am ready

Sano:: ( picks up Zanbatou) This is what I want a nice fight to show off a bit to the ladies.

Skuld:: That's a nice weapon

Sano:: Really you think so. Wait never mind this is suppose to be a fight not a conversation.

Belldandy:: ( throws pokemon at Sano and hits him with it) Go butterfree Tackle attack.

Sano:: (Gets an annoyed look)

Skuld:: Ahh it's a bug ( hits butterfree off the stage) It's gone now we are all ok.

Sano:: Not that kind of battle!

Skuld:: ( holds out Yu-Gi-Oh card) Go Blue eyes white dragon Whit lighting attack!

Sano:: ( Anime falls) Do you 2 even know how to actually FIGHT!!!

Belldandy and Skuld:: Yea we know how to fight but we don't like you :: sticks out tongue::

Sano:: I give up. You 2 are hopeless. I am out of here

( Sano leaves and the Goddess follow him)

Rosiel
12-19-2003, 08:40 AM
My advice would be to read it, in character, and time yourself, trying to come under a minute (short and sweet is best). As an audience, I lost interest around the Social Studies teacher part...

Hence I'd say cut the Pokemon/Yu-Gi-Oh parts and try to shorten it, making all lines count as punchlines. Funny skits are hard to write as you need to keep the momentum -and the jokes- coming. x__X

Koumori
12-19-2003, 09:04 AM
I agree that it's too long, and like Rosiel, I started to wander off around the social-studies line. You can cut quite a bit of the random bickering and still get your central idea across. I tend to watch more masquerades than I participate in, and as an audience member, my main complaint is almost always that skits go on long after they've made their point and shown their costumes. Short and sweet is always best, especially in skits that want to be funny.

Akiko Ki
12-21-2003, 02:24 AM
Ok fact is I so can't write funny stuff no matter how I try I can only write serious stuff and like action but realy don't know how to go about writeing a funny Skit I really need to get it down and started cause there is alot to be done and only a 7 months left to do pratices and music parts adn recoreding then praticeing lipsynicing to it, so I can take some ideas on a new one cause my specialty is writeing. I only need ides to start.

Koumori
12-21-2003, 08:32 AM
Ok fact is I so can't write funny stuff no matter how I try I can only write serious stuff and like action but realy don't know how to go about writeing a funny Skit I really need to get it down and started cause there is alot to be done and only a 7 months left to do pratices and music parts adn recoreding then praticeing lipsynicing to it, so I can take some ideas on a new one cause my specialty is writeing. I only need ides to start.

Why not just cut down the one you have? You have PLENTY of time.

Akiko Ki
12-21-2003, 12:08 PM
Why not just cut down the one you have? You have PLENTY of time.

I can do that but I would like to know what parts are the best for the veiwer and then I can cut adn edit it.

Akiko Ki
12-21-2003, 09:42 PM
Ok all I got a new one fixed up adn more funny let me know what ya think of it. It is shorter to well surrley fit
***********************************************
( Skuld and Belldandy come in)

Skuld:: Keiichi is supposed to meet us here. Where is he (paces back and forth)?

Belldandy:: I am no sure where he is Skuld (watches Skuld pace)

(Sano comes in)

Belldandy and Skuld:: You're not Keiichi!

Sano:: (shrugs) I know, He took the day off.

Skuld:: (pokes Sano) I don't like you all ready.

Sano:: (smacks Skulds hand) I didn't say you could touch me crazy woman

Belldandy ( puts hands on hips ) Now be nice, both of you

Skuld:: Yea shory be nice (sticks out tounge)

Sano:: You started it, and I am not that short

Skuld::: Shorty ,shorty ,shorty (does a little dance)

Belldandy:: SKULD I SAID BE NICE!

Sano:: Ya Skuld be nice you little brat.

Belldandy:: You are very rude I think we need to teach you a lesson ( grabs staff)

Skuld:: Alright. Lets beat up the little man ( grabs hammer and stands up)

( Both girls have evil smiles)

Sano:: Ya right you to beat Zanza don't make me laugh. Oh wait I am ( laughs)

Belldandy and Skuld:: Fine you don't want to take us serious

Belldandy:; Ready Skuld!

Skuld:: I am ready

Sano:: ( picks up Zanbatou) This is what I want a nice fight to show off a bit to the ladies.

Skuld:: That's a nice weapon

Sano:: Really you think so. Wait never mind this is suppose to be a fight not a conversation.

Belldandy:: ( throws pokemon at Sano and hits him with it) Go butterfree Tackle attack.

Sano:: (Gets an annoyed look)

Skuld:: Ahh it's a bug ( hits butterfree off the stage) It's gone now we are all ok.

Sano:: Not that kind of battle!

Skuld:: ( holds out Yu-Gi-Oh card) Go Blue eyes white dragon Whit lighting attack!

Sano:: ( Anime falls) Do you 2 even know how to actually FIGHT!!!

Belldandy and Skuld:: Yea we know how to fight but we don't like you :: sticks out tongue::

Sano:: (puts head in hand and shakes head) (mumbles) i am gonna kill keiichi for this... (stands in fighting stance) Ok then show me how you fight!

Skuld:: ( in a bratty way) Ya know... I really dont feel like fighting right now.

Sano:: ( looks at Belldandy as they start off stage) So you got anymore of those yu-gi-oh cards?

Belldandy:: (pulls huge flip book out of virtually out of thin air) yea! I love yu-gi-oh cards!

( Both leave Stage)

Akiko Ki
12-28-2003, 07:30 PM
I want ot know what ya think about this one now one got an comments they can be negitive I don't care I need help with any way I cna use any suggestions

Akiko Ki
01-03-2004, 12:50 AM
What no one got any comments on it I really really want to know cause I like to know what people think and if its any good or not