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Unread 08-29-2012, 05:27 PM   #3832
I can fix it!
Kildread's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 5,796
Originally Posted by DireKitty View Post
Fanshawe. I have been in London a ton - never really looked for nerd shops. Guelph doesn't have any either.
Gurl, you've been to nerd shops --- you've been to the internet!

Originally Posted by Drysi View Post
(Anything said below is only based on the writings and perceived implications)

I think there's faults on both sides, the problem with being rejected is that we usually can't quite dump it all out as soon as one of the parties decides "Nah, it's not gonna work out.". The one who decided this has already resolved everything in their head, while the rejected party now needs to do so (And it's usually a surprise that it happens). Something he obviously wasn't able to do after all, I'd wager the subsequent game was a result of him seeing her 'explore the intimacy of their mutual friends circle', probably while he was still hanging on.

Frankly, what was he thinking? Things are not gonna change with time and she's got the right to be happy too. But I understand all too well the emotions one feels after being given the roundabout. However, that he'd pull that after she changed her mind is totally a low-blow.

But then again, what was she thinking? Call it quits, then start getting in the life of mutual friends thinking he'd take no issue about it? It's clear he has no claim on her, that's obvious, but I feel it's also kind of a lack of respect. I'm assuming any 'current dates' within their friends circles were made obviously clear to him too.

So... I think her refusing him initially was well-deserved, even if she could have done so cleanly, seeing how that turned out. Similarly, she at least got to feel what being turned down in a totally asinine way is. It's not fair, it never is.

In all, relationships are indeed a bloody mess to deal with (Because they're entirely selfish endeavors). I don't think there's any counsel you can give her. The logical thing would only have been hindsight where they both needed to leave each other alone for a while --- which included not poisoning their friends' circles with their behavior. It might have turned better that way.
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