It depends, usually if an item is worth over £45, then it will most likely be stopped at customs. I once had to pay £25 to go collect something. But usually, especially if you buy from sellers who reside in Asia, they will mark down the value of the package on the slip that comes with it to avoid it getting stuck at customs.
Handling fees varies with sellers, there's no negotiation really.
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Bubbles - Powerpuff Girls Z