Ashe, you did not mention what kinds of eyeliner you have tried but have you ever used powder eyeliner? It is pretty easy to apply and you can make thin-to-thick lines quickly. As it is a powder, it does not look shiny, rather it has a velvety texture. Pic related.
L'oreal also makes a mineral eyeliner powder which gives a nice, clean, matte look. If you use this, get a real eyeliner brush as the one that is included is really cheap. If you find that you are getting specks of powder everywhere, dampen the tip of your brush before applying and it will help contain and deliver the product exactly where you want.
Another possibility is to get absolutely matte cream eyeliners, eyeliner pencils, and liquid liner. Some of them have shimmer or sparkles in the formula which can look more like "party time" than "natural". However, many brands do have matte formulas so seek them out, I particularly like NYX products as they are decent quality products but not so expensive that you feel guilty if a few of them turn out different than you thought.
In terms of mascara, if you want really noticeable lashes like what they show you in makeup commercials and adverts, you are going to need false lashes to achieve that look, though they never tell consumers that. However, you can make your natural lashes more noticeable [just not as noticeable as with falsies] using a mascara. Here too, I like NYX products so you can try all the formulas without breaking the bank. My current favorite from them is Doll Eye mascara which also comes in a waterproof formula. Honestly though, most people have a brand they like the most and can find a suitable formula from said brand's offerings so it will take a bit of trial and error since not everyone wants the same thing from their mascara.