I'm really glad usuyukisou came in here and pretty much said what I was thinking. You said it a lot more politely than I would have.
It's friggin' ridiculous enough as is that there's well-known cosplayers who are happy to rely on B.S., broken, "look at meeeee I'm (pretending to be) famous" behaviour and hardly care about how much beauty-pageant-style elitism it enforces onto everyone else. (And why would they care? They benefit personally from that system. As long as they're the centre of attention on a pedestal, there's no problems).
The fact that this seller is now, whether intentionally or not, giving preferential treatment is unprofessional and irresponsible. So, frankly, I don't think you should bother finding out "how he is as a person", especially not from someone who has nothing to do with your business situation. ESPECIALLY not from someone whom the seller has deliberately placed you on unequal footing with. Your money is as good as anyone else's. He took your money and refused to give you the product. He failed to provide any reason or notice as to why the delays have been happening. Short of being abducted or stranded in the desert, I'm really not seeing why you should bother with a character reference. You are his customer, not an audience member on Oprah. Wasting your time to find out about his feels only scams you further.
Talk to your bank, and keep contacting the seller if you can. Hell, if it doesn't end up costing you more money, look into small claims? It's a bit of a political headache, but it might be a viable option for getting the money back.