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Unread 01-03-2013, 05:42 PM   #7
Lithium Flower
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 14,342
Originally Posted by Touva View Post
My best friend and I are going to Ohayocon in a few weeks, and we know for a fact that a certain guy we met at Sugoicon will be there also. He spent some time hanging out with us and it was glaringly obvious that he was rather attracted to my friend, but she thought he was just being nice so she didn't shy away from him. She doesn't want to tell him off for some reason, but she's dreading inevitably meeting him at Ohayo.

What are some (clever? XD) ways to try to get away from a creeper before notifying the proper authorities?
Here are Emmers easy steps to telling someone to go away;
  1. Don't pretend to be interested in someone for the sake of being nice: Being 'nice' doesn't mean never turning down someone's advances. It means being able to tell this individual your honest feelings without being sneaky or passive aggressive.
  2. If someone makes you feel uncomfortable, Tell them firmly to stop:Hiding in a corner and faking interest in someone (whether or not it's romantic or friendly interest you are expressing) sends the wrong messages and encourages someone to continue the behavior you are not comfortable with. Be honest and up front when someone is making you feel uncomfortable. Tell them you do not appreciate how they're speaking to you, acting with you, and that you want them to stop.
  3. Be strong, firm, and confident in denying someone your attention: It doesn't matter if someone just wants to be friends or is showing unwanted romantic attention, you have a right to say no to anybody and you do not have to be around people that make you nervous or afraid. When you tell someone "No" tell them firmly and confidently; "I don't like you that way and I want you to stop". You should never sacrafice your comfort in order to prevent someone from feeling bad when you say "No", you deserve to feel safe and should not have to feel scared.
  4. If someone is not listening to you, continues making unwanted gestures towards you, or otherwise makes you feel uncomfortable or unsafe seek out help from an authority figure: If this individual does not stop making unwanted passes at your friend despite her firmly asking him not to and telling him she does not want to be with him then you should approach the nearest security personnel. Explain that this person is not wanted around you but will not leave you alone. Again, be firm in saying "No". Sometimes we feel bad for telling someone "No" if they seem nice but you have to be confident when you say that you do not want this person around you and need help making them stop. Explaining that you feel uncomfortable and unsafe around someone is not something to feel bad about, you have a right to be and feel safe and you shouldn't put someone else's hurt feelings above you feeling safe.

Instead of trying to be 'clever' (which you aren't being if you just look for sarcastic shit to say to someone), just be honest.
Iíll tell you what people look like, really: they look like flames. Or like the stars, on a clear night in the wilderness.
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