Originally Posted by emmisu
If you're worried about being accepted, people will find something to judge no matter what you wear. If you're worried about the community shunning you?
Well they all had to start sometime, right? Being stuck up and elitist about they way they dress isn't going to help their group win friends and influence people to love and accept the lolita lifestyle in the mainstream.
This. I was lucky enough to find a very nice Italian community when I got interested, and even if I made mistakes they were pointed out kindly and the older members helped me to become better at it by giving me advice, websites, pictures, chatting with me, guinding me throught the learning process.
I only lurk EGL on livejournal because a lot (not everyone, there are great people too) of the lolitas there only say "That's wrong!/That's not lolita!" without
the helping part, expecting that new lolitas learn everything by them selves. While it's true that nowadays there are a lot of well-done and simple guides online, having a real person that can help and explain directly is invaluable.