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[PurePlummet]

I get this question a lot, whether I'm crossplaying or cosplaying (I guess my face is just very androgynous or I'm incredibly bad at makeup). How do you guys typically react/answer this question? Are you flattered or offended? Do you immediately tell them your gender identity or do you dodge the question and bask in the enigma?

I'm curious to see what everyone does! Let's hear your stories!

[JasonTerror]

When I was thinner, I used to wear female skinny jeans and tight shirts, and I got mistaken for a girl many many many times. I was always neutral, because I'm a guy but I like more girl things. So it never really struck me the wrong way or anything..when I get back down to that size or smaller, I'll be cosplaying and doing loli, so if I'm mistaken for a girl I'll take it as a complement

[TheDragonPrince]

I'm always a bit flattered that I can pass. It makes me feel more masculine and a bit bit better arbou myself.

[Li_Syaoran]

Well.... first I would like you to take a look at this pic, This is my first crossplay which i had worn 1 month ago. Then attempt to guess at my gender.
https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphot...12807382_n.jpg


Now to answer your question, I Mostly I just keep silent to myself and have others keep on guessing :P

[JasonTerror]

Originally Posted by Li_Syaoran

Well.... first I would like you to take a look at this pic, This is my first crossplay which i had worn 1 month ago. Then attempt to guess at my gender.
https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphot...12807382_n.jpg


Now to answer your question, I Mostly I just keep silent to myself and have others keep on guessing :P

Hey Sen, at the con my dad couldn't tell....You know, the guy with the really long hair..Yea him..He didn't even know..I had to tell him....

[Li_Syaoran]

Originally Posted by JasonTerror

Hey Sen, at the con my dad couldn't tell....You know, the guy with the really long hair..Yea him..He didn't even know..I had to tell him....

DANG! what was his reaction?

[TenTigerLilies]

Female here. I've had it happen to me on a couple occassions, even when I was in 8th grade and used to dress a little boyishly and keepy my hair pretty short, I got asked on two seperate out-of-costume occassions, "Are you a boy or a girl?" and I guess I wasn't exactly pleased, but not exactly mad, so I would smile sarcastically and ask, "What do you think?"

In costume...well, I'm a crossplayer that doesn't wear a binder, however, with some of my costumes being rather bulky or particularly loose, the question does come up fairly frequently, and it's everything from genuine curiosity to outright rudeness, and as a cosplayer (or specifically, a crossplayer), I think that, unless you're a guy wearing a costume that doesn't require a shirt or a female wearing a costume that's practically a bra and a skirt, then it's really likely that the question is going to come up. Typically, I'm pretty pleased to hear it, because to me it simply means that I did a good job on my makeup.

[PurePlummet]

Originally Posted by Li_Syaoran

Well.... first I would like you to take a look at this pic, This is my first crossplay which i had worn 1 month ago. Then attempt to guess at my gender.
https://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphot...12807382_n.jpg


Now to answer your question, I Mostly I just keep silent to myself and have others keep on guessing :P

Well, judging by the fact that you're dressed in women's clothes in the picture + the fact that you say it's your first crossplay, I'm going to conclude via logic that you are male! Otherwise since you've covered almost everything up it's really difficult to tell, haha.

It's interesting hearing everyone's reactions, but I'd like to hear more about your responses. Li_Syaoran said they just stand there silently and have the person keep guessing (I'm guessing it probably doesn't take more than 3 tries to get the right answer). What do you guys say/do in response to the question?

I ask because while it's generally considered not very good etiquette to make speculations on a cosplayer's gender, it's kind of a hard question to avoid when one crossplays frequently, and I never really know how to respond.

[JasonTerror]

Originally Posted by Li_Syaoran

DANG! what was his reaction?

He said you make a good chick lol
I told him about the Len thing and how it's a male vocaloid blah blah blah and he was like "oh, kool. he pulls it off well."

He thought the maid one was a bit....odd..But not that much..

[Blood_Sword]

God knows how many times I've got the "Are you a boy or a girl?" question both in cosplay and out of it..

Now first of I'm transgender male, pre-everything. I must say that whenever I get asked that question I feel very mixed emotions. Firstly it means I did a decent job presenting male because they can't tell my biological gender straight away -but- at the same time I feel very awkward and more often than not, hurt, because that question also means that I didn't completely pass either because they are still questioning. It's very hard to describe exactly what I mean... there's so much going on in my head whenever that question pops up and I almost never know what answer to give when asked either. I just stand there awkwardly and if I happen to have my cosplay friends around me occasionally they might chime in and tell the asker I am in fact a he/him/male/whatever or, although rarer, transgendered. Yes, I am very open about it at at cons, like if someone were to ask me if I'm transgendered I'd answer "yes I am". It's not something I am ashamed of, it's who I am. But for some reason I just have a dang hard time to tell it when asked that "are you a boy or a girl?" question because that question is so.. unforgiving and blunt... it gives me no leeway; just black and white without gray. It makes me confused are they in fact asking for my assigned at birth gender (which I hate to associate myself with) or the gender I identify with? And seriously, why does it even matter so much what I am in the end? I'm human just like you and everyone else, let me do my cosplaying and have fun without infecting my mind with such troublesome and secondary things like gender.

Also, some years ago I used to think cosplaying male characters was crossplay to me because I am not biologically male... but.. because I identify as male I no more view it as crossplay, I am cosplaying my gender at heart. It's just cosplay. Actually I get a bit offended when told that I crossplay.. because that means they assume I'm female which I'm not...

Sorry for the long post and if I make no sense.

[IchiBLEACHcake]

I am actually pretty darn feminine looking when I'm not crossplaying, though I've been mistaken several times for a male when dressed up, even to the point where I've had 'fangirls'. I felt a little awkward just for being mistaken for a male when two girls were unknowingly hitting on another girl when they were straight, but in general I think it's flattering since I take time and effort with makeup and bodyshaping/binding to look male.
My ex boyfriend wasn't too keen on me looking male, though XD

[Zaiten]

I used to get it a lot when I was younger, in fact I even had a teacher ask if I was a boy or a girl which lead to quite a large amount of ridicule from my classmates. It's rarer now and usually only when I'm wearing male clothing do people assume I'm male and usually only from a short distance, cosplaying or regularly.

But, eh, I wear what I want and tend not to worry too much on gender anyway. I personally think I make a poor crossplayer but then again, I can also suck at regular cosplaying. I blame my weird facial structure. But oh well, it's what I have fun doing so I'll keep at it.

[VickyAmis]

People always like to talk about others or give comments on others' clothes, and they think it's funny.But they seldom care others' feeling. In fact, many people feel hurt when they are asked this kind of question. I would like to say, it's none of your business. And you guys are quite funny!

[PurePlummet]

Originally Posted by Blood_Sword

And seriously, why does it even matter so much what I am in the end? I'm human just like you and everyone else, let me do my cosplaying and have fun without infecting my mind with such troublesome and secondary things like gender.

I completely agree! I feel like gender, like age or ethnicity, is irrelevant to costuming skill, ability to act in character, and having fun. I really don't see the point in acting such a pointless (and potentially hurtful) question, and I never know how to respond because most of the time people are just curious and don't know that they're being offensive.

Originally Posted by VickyAmis

People always like to talk about others or give comments on others' clothes, and they think it's funny.But they seldom care others' feeling. In fact, many people feel hurt when they are asked this kind of question. I would like to say, it's none of your business. And you guys are quite funny!

This is completely true, but there are also times when people aren't asking to be malicious, but are genuinely curious. Then it's kind of hard to respond without sounding like a jerk XD;

[tereshkova2001]

I ran across this post on Tumblr which I really loved:
http://derpderpmotherfuckers.tumblr....ary-or-why-the

The punchline: "The gender of the cosplayer doesn’t actually matter. They’re busy doing what cosplay is all about: being a successful chameleon, taking on the physical characteristics of a character so well you can’t guess anything about the person behind them, even their gender. "