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Unread 12-06-2014, 09:45 PM   #1
Kanako Maeda
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My friend is in trouble and I'm out of ideas

A few days ago, I had a somewhat rather long conversation with a friend of mine, and found out that her situation was not good. Her live-in roommates are constantly berating and mistreating her. They won't do anything to help her get a job, but have no problem complaining about it to her. Due to this environment, she's also become much colder as a person, and I find that rather alarming.

A brief overview:
She's been laid off, doesn't know of any openings in her area, and it looks as though she'll be kicked out within this month, This is a desperate situation for her and she's really at her wits end, Any help would be greatly appreciated. I'm not really sure if this is the right place to ask for this kind of support, but I know this is a supportive community as opposed to places like 4chan. ANY and all help would be greatly appreciated. She's willing to work pretty much anywhere at an entry level employee. I'm honestly very concerned about her, and asked if it was alright to post here for help. Her name is rakufang on here, and it'd be greatly appreciated if you had ANY thing you can do for her. I'm not posting all the details as I figured it she be up to her what she'd like to share, but I did encourage her to let me at least try something here.
She's not in complete dire straits, but I'd like to help her avoid that altogether. Any suggestions, again would be GREATLY appreciated.
I'm not one to usually post stuff like this but as I thought the situation was beyond my help alone, I thought it best to try a Hail Mary.
Again, her name on here is: rakufang
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Unread 12-06-2014, 11:03 PM   #2
Jei-Cos
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Is there ANYWHERE else she can go? As much as I hate to say it, she's better off being kicked out of a place that she shouldn't actually be in, than to stay there..Any family or other friends that will help her for even a small amount of time? That's the first step. Get her the eff outta there regardless. That is NOT somewhere she should be if what you say is true (which I'm assuming it is).

Next would be for her to hit up any labor ready or worksource buildings in the area. If anything, it's at least money to help.

I know all too well what it's like when there's no work out there..I didn't have a job from dec 27 2011 (yep 2 days after xmas) till now (I'm in my 3rd work week at this new job, it's been 3 years!!). I fortunately had many other people on my side giving me a place to stay. Also, not having work, she should be able to apply for state help (food stamps, and so on. It's embarrassing, but what's worse, no food, or having food stamps?)

I wish this person the best, and good luck.
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Unread 12-07-2014, 07:13 AM   #3
Dictamnus Albus
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second that, its not good to remain in a hostile environment,

also wanted to note that, food "stamps" is alot less embarrasing than it used to be,
now most states issue a debit style card, so most people dont think twice, though it does
show up on the register screen and your reciept when you shop, but its much better than
the voucher tags they used to have (still issue vouchers in cases like home displacements though)

stores tend to have the most likleyhood of job openings
most job listings online tend to have experiance requirement or degrees

hope things turn out well
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Unread 12-07-2014, 01:09 PM   #4
Jei-Cos
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dictamnus Albus View Post
second that, its not good to remain in a hostile environment,

also wanted to note that, food "stamps" is alot less embarrasing than it used to be,
now most states issue a debit style card, so most people dont think twice, though it does
show up on the register screen and your reciept when you shop, but its much better than
the voucher tags they used to have (still issue vouchers in cases like home displacements though)

stores tend to have the most likleyhood of job openings
most job listings online tend to have experiance requirement or degrees

hope things turn out well
On he food stamp thing, That's kinda what I was trying to get across lol I guess being just gotten off work I was really tired so I couldn't word it so thanks for wording it better.

My whole point was even though it's more "debit card" looking now, people are still really embarrased. Not just having them, but the fact that the majority of people that use them, think people will go "Oh, that family is so poor, their lives must suck", That's how it's a;ways been with state help..The people that don't need it assume that you must be super poor or homeless or something, and that's very embarrassing..The problem is, people only THINK that..I've never actually herd someone say any of those things lol I only said it because if you bring it up to her, there may be a chance that she thinks someone will say these things or something, and she might feel embarrassed and that she shouldn't.

Again, I hope everything works out for her
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Unread 12-07-2014, 11:15 PM   #5
boricuaspartan
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I'm really sorry that you're friend is going through this. Times are definetly hard right now (have been for quite a few years now. Especially with the whole job thing) and not having supporting people around her DEFINETLY does NOT make the situation any better. I agree that she definetly needs to get outta there. If she doesn't have anywhere else to go, can she possibly stay with you? Just until she gets back on her feet? If not, then she's definetly gonna have to get in touch with someone (be it friends or family) and find SOMEONE to stay with until she gets back on her feet.

Now on the note of not being able to find work, I will say this. If finding a job proves to be too difficult for her after a certain amount of time, then one thing she may want to consider is possibly joining the military. I mean I know I'm a little biased because I'm in the Army. But I was in that same boat for quite some time too, so I know what it's like to struggle finding a good job.

Where I worked at for 3 years prior to joining the Army, I had to deal with stupid annoying whining customers EVERY day, my bosses didn't give a crap me or about they're employees' family situations, they enforced a lot of rules that I swear were unconstitutional, and a lot of other stuff that REALLY stressed me out. There were mornings where I would wake up and I'd just start crying because I HATED that job SO MUCH and wanted so badly to work somewhere else. But no matter how many jobs I applied to, NO ONE got back to me about anything. And then the worse possible scenario happened...I stood up to them about a lot of the issues we were facing at that job...and they basically pointed me out the door. So there I was with no job, no way to support myself, AND I had a wife and 2 kids (one of them an infant at the time) to take care of. So imagine how bad I felt. I didn't really have the luxury to wait around anymore hoping to get lucky in finding another job, so I went to talk to a recruiter and in 3 weeks I was sworn in. We stayed with some family for a few months and then I took off to basic training and now we're ok.

I suggest the military to a lot of people that are struggling to find work because it really isn't as bad of a life as people make it out to be. Yes, being a soldier does require a LOT of sacrifice, BUT it does provide a LOT of stability and benefits that a good portion of citizens struggle to find these days. I mean free housing, free medical coverage, free education, the chance to travel around and see the world, and it's a good stepping stone to finding a good job after you're term because it gives you job experience and the chance to even possibly get a security clearance (which does WONDERS for you in the workforce). I mean it really is a good choice and if it wasn't for the Army I shutter to think where my family and I would be at this point. So yeah, if she's really struggling to find work, that would be my suggestion. And if for whatever reason her (or anyone else here for that matter) want to know more about what the military can do for her (or you), please don't hesitate to have her PM me and I'll do my best to give her the most accurate information I can.

I wish her the best.
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Unread 12-09-2014, 08:43 PM   #6
Kanako Maeda
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Thanks a LOT you guys. I posted this thread to her, and she said she's tried some of these approaches. I just really don't know what to do for her. We both REALLY appreciate all the advice and help you guys had to offer. We'll keep trying. It's just kind of a hard pressed situation that just keeps getting harder day by day. She's gone kind of "cold" due to her environmental circumstances, so it's hard for me to motivate her, but believe me the help is precious and treasured. I can't thank you guys enough for trying. *hugs* Thank you so much on both of our behalves. Love you guys!
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