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Unread 04-15-2011, 02:25 AM   #1
JewishCosplayer
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How would you feel about dating someone who doesn't like cosplaying?

I'm not trying to say that you shouldn't date someone just because they don't share the same interest as you, I'm just asking a question about people's personal view on the subject.

For me?
Well, Cosplay is a huge part of my life. While I wouldn't let it decide the fate of a relationship for me, it would be a factor. I love cosplaying and attending conventions. I would be very sad and dissapointed if my partner didn't share my passion. However, it wouldn't be the deciding factor to the relationship, as stated before.

I'd prefer to have someone who likes cosplaying, or at least is willing to cosplay certain characters for my pairing shots xD That'd be perfect as well.

Anyone else's view?
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Unread 04-15-2011, 02:29 AM   #2
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I would just hope that they would be able to accept the fact that I'm going to dress up as a video game/cartoon character every other weekend. xD Though, if they actually had a problem with the fact that I'm a cosplayer and tried to change me, I'd question the relationship.
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Unread 04-15-2011, 02:31 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tehkukikookie View Post
I would just hope that they would be able to accept the fact that I'm going to dress up as a video game/cartoon character every other weekend. xD Though, if they actually had a problem with the fact that I'm a cosplayer and tried to change me, I'd question the relationship.
Ya, I can understand if they didn't want to cosplay themselves, but if they tried to change you then I'd have to call the relationship into questioning. I mean, if they can't be supportive, that would really bother me. I'd be all, "Hey I like cosplaying. I don't bother you about your hobbies so let me enjoy mine." xD
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Unread 04-15-2011, 03:24 AM   #4
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My boyfriend was open to the idea when I started going out with him, but a trip to a small con with me dressed as Chun Li turned him off to the idea. He didn't like getting stopped so much for photos. Now whenever I talk about cosplay plans he either says it's stupid or keeps his mouth shut. I have to remind him I listen to him babble about things I don't particularly care for or about. It's unfortunate, so I just have to remind him about all the nifty comic book stuff I'll be bringing back from the cons I attend, alone.

I think that's what gets me the most, I have to go to conventions alone now. I used to cosplay with my ex all the time. It was like our thing. But going solo isn't always so bad. I can do whatever I want, whenever I want!
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Unread 04-15-2011, 04:13 AM   #5
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I wouldn't mind if they aren't cosplayers themselves, but they at least have to have some form of respect/acceptance for it

I don't want them thinking its stupid or lame because then it just wouldn't work out. Cosplaying is the majority of what I talk about so I don't see how we could carry on too many conversations. lol
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Unread 04-15-2011, 04:45 AM   #6
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The same way I'd feel dating someone who doesn't like my favorite book or isn't into photography.

As long as they don't give me too much shit about it or demand I stop doing/liking what I do/like -- I'm not sure I see how it matters.
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Unread 04-15-2011, 04:49 AM   #7
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Yeaaah, that happened to me about my last girlfriend. Didn't like the idea of me being into anime. Couple months down the road, found out I bought an anime figure, then texted me that it was off because I didn't change for her.

While I don't cosplay at the moment, if I had a girlfriend that did, well, that's a huge plus.
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Unread 04-15-2011, 05:27 AM   #8
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I wouldn't mind if they didn't like cosplaying themselves but if they're the type that think that cosplayers need to "get a life." That would be the deal breaker. Although someone who doesn't cosplay and/or doesn't like hearing about it probably wouldn't want to date me. I always have some project in the works so I talk about cosplay constantly.
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Unread 04-15-2011, 05:48 AM   #9
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It's my hobby and something I derive a part of my income from. One day, I'm hoping to do it full-time and make a living off it. The hubby doesn't want to cosplay and misses me when I go without him to conventions, but he understands why I do it.

It's like him and Magic: the Gathering. While I like playing and do it semi-competitively, I'm not as into it as he is. I miss him when he goes to tournaments, but I consider it the trade-off for my con-going.
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Unread 04-15-2011, 08:45 AM   #10
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I wouldn't really give a crud. It isn't the end of the world to me because someone I like might not also enjoy putting on spandex Superman costumes on the side.

Boyfriend doesn't usually for srsface cosplay since he goes with a booth at the artist alley :K he does wear a Cyberman mask though.

He tries to get me to cosplay all the characters he loves so "Someone will do them well" ^///^ hehe.
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Unread 04-15-2011, 08:51 AM   #11
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I haven't dated anyone who cosplays yet. I wasn't even into cosplay a few years ago (Not that the will wasn't there, I'm just slow to jump into new activities).

Right now, I still wouldn't mind --- I'm fine with having a few common activities and find stuff we enjoy to do together.

As others have said, it boils down to whether my partner wants to be controlling about my choice of activities. One of my convention friends just had a falling out in her relation over stuff like that.

And I'm like "Wow, sometimes people can't realize there's 2 individuals in a relation".
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Unread 04-15-2011, 09:15 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kildread View Post
I haven't dated anyone who cosplays yet. I wasn't even into cosplay a few years ago (Not that the will wasn't there, I'm just slow to jump into new activities).

Right now, I still wouldn't mind --- I'm fine with having a few common activities and find stuff we enjoy to do together.

As others have said, it boils down to whether my partner wants to be controlling about my choice of activities. One of my convention friends just had a falling out in her relation over stuff like that.

And I'm like "Wow, sometimes people can't realize there's 2 individuals in a relation".
This. Which tends to be what breaks up most of my relationships. Strangely it's because they don't understand why I don't give a crap what they do.

"I'm going out with some friends."
"K, enjoy."
"you gonna call me?"
"uh, no... why?"
"...you don't want to check in on me?"
"No, i'm not your mom... go, and have fun with your friends."

next day

"You didn't call me."
"I said I wasn't going to."
"Yah but... i'm used to girls calling me."
"GTFO"


If they want to go do X, Y or Z, good on them. I'm not their mom, they are an adult, they can do their own shit without my permission. If they let me know when they are coming back, I might bake them some banana bread or something, otherwise go have fun.

I'm like a cat, I enjoy when people are around, i'm also just as content being left alone to read or whatever. My last ex thought that was great at first, since he goes on bike tours for a week here and there. But he ended up being the controlling one, questioning everything. If someone does something that annoys me, more often then not i don't bring it up... because it doesn't matter. Everyone has annoying facets of their personality. Being in a relationship means ignoring them for the other jems. Oh hell no, everything was under a microscope... and we had to talk about EVERYTHING. I don't do that stuff. I don't want to get into a big conversation about not holding your hand at dinner... or about leaving a mug in the sink. I clean your mugs without whining about it, so stfu and clean mine.

... and if they piss you off too much, you give 'em a paw swat to the head, then get over it.

I could care less if my next bf gets into a costume and runs around with me, as long as he's cool with me doing it. If he does get into a costume and runs around with me, thats cool too. If he doesn't want to cosplay with me, thats fine (he just misses out on the EXTREME fun of being around me).

I dunno, maybe i'm just an ice queen and part of being an awesome gf is calling 24/7 and trying to ensure they never go out with their friends and the like... and trying to be at their house all the time... and having deep conversations about mugs and shit.... >.>
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Unread 04-15-2011, 09:22 AM   #13
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I dunno, maybe i'm just an ice queen and part of being an awesome gf is calling 24/7 and trying to ensure they never go out with their friends and the like... and trying to be at their house all the time... and having deep conversations about mugs and shit.... >.>
Maybe we're both horrible horrible people?
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Unread 04-15-2011, 09:31 AM   #14
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As long as they accepted it and didn't try to stop me, it's fine.

My ex was very controlling and tried to stop me specifically from crossplaying. He said he only wanted me to do female cosplays if I was going to do it at all. He simply would not let the matter go, he couldn't hold a conversation without ripping into me about it and so it was one of many reasons that led to a breakup.

But yeah, if I were with someone and they didn't cosplay, I wouldn't mind as long as they were supportive about it.
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Unread 04-15-2011, 09:34 AM   #15
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I would only ask that the guy have an open mind. (Whether it be giving it a try once or at least being supportive of the fact that I enjoy doing it.) My ex was able to be talked into a couple costumes and I think he was a real trooper for giving it a try.
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