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Unread 05-22-2013, 10:15 PM   #5776
Sokmunki
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Originally Posted by Loveable-Eve View Post
I don't know why but I've been emotionally stressed for over a week now. The tiniest things make me sprial into depression. It's causing me to have horrible sleep/dreams causing me to much rather not sleep at all.
Of course I still have to face the world as well, which is hard on no sleep.
Same here :/ though the weather here isn't much help... Dreary rain when it's supposed to be summerish :/
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Unread 05-22-2013, 10:31 PM   #5777
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Originally Posted by Loveable-Eve View Post
I don't know why but I've been emotionally stressed for over a week now. The tiniest things make me sprial into depression. It's causing me to have horrible sleep/dreams causing me to much rather not sleep at all.
Of course I still have to face the world as well, which is hard on no sleep.
I'm having the same sort of problem. Doesn't help that I'm now on summer break and with nothing to do but sit around the house and find things to do most days, as I have parents that work and very few friends who would be interested in doing anything together or be able to. Along with that fact, I'm rarely really conversing with anyone as said friends don't always seem to want to talk to me...Three days into a two-month break and I'm already starting to get horribly lonely and depressed about it, not to mention snappier and easier to anger since I really have nothing to vent it out into..I've found it harder to write when that used to help me vent immensely, and drawing just simply bores me right now, as I have no drive to challenge myself, either.
Same thing with the bad dreams. I'm fairly certain the one I had last night involved me being at some gathering where I knew all my friends were, but couldn't find any of them..as they were mostly avoiding and ignoring me. A pretty simple representation of how I'm feeling with them all right now..It is, needless to say, incredibly frustrating.

On a smaller note, if this damn cough does not stop within the week...>.> It caused me to have a LOT of difficulty sleeping last night, coughing every 3 seconds..
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Unread 05-23-2013, 08:51 AM   #5778
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Bleh, I've been waiting all week for my new jogging shorts to arrive, and it's suddenly started pouring it down after a whole week of sunshine. v_v
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Unread 05-23-2013, 11:02 PM   #5779
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@Sokmunki and FuntomKitten: I think there is just something in the air. Because all my friends have been feeling moody as well.
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Unread 05-23-2013, 11:35 PM   #5780
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@loveable-eve I think that might be it... :/
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Unread 05-24-2013, 01:58 PM   #5781
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Perhaps.
I've noticed what else isn't helping it, though.
My birthday is in two weeks. That's great, right? I'll get all the presents and money and the day will be about me..
Oh wait. Everyone's too focused on the fact that your sister's going to college to care. Not a single person has asked what I'd want, nobody's mentioned or teased me about it, and that..is pissing me off and not helping this self esteem issue in the slightest. I don't want all of the attention from her, but I'd appreciate even just getting a chance to tell them what I'd like to have, since it's one of two days I ask for a little bit of attention..But all they talk about is her going off. It's a big deal, I understand, but...You still have two daughters, parents, and I feel like they've just forgotten about me completely..
The best part? I get to spend my birthday at my sister's college, being absolutely bored and forgotten as she meets her professors and whatnot. What a wonderful way to rub it in my face.
Oh well. No helping it. At this point, I'm just hoping I get the money to get a Grell cosplay and his shoes. I still wouldn't be totally happy with just that, but..I'm fairly certain that's as much as I'm going to get at this point.
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Unread 05-24-2013, 10:03 PM   #5782
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Aww! @funtomkitten that sounds so... Horrible :/ same happened to me 2 years ago... But my sisters collage was in California, and that was sort of a vacationish thing. But we drove down there on my birthday, so I think they only acknowledged my birthday once in the morning :/ the whole trip was about my sister :/ grr
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Tintin
Belphagor from KHR
11th and 10th doctors
Amy Pond
Merida
Jack Frost
Sherlock (BBC)
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Unread 05-26-2013, 08:28 AM   #5783
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I hate it whenever some of my close friends find their selves a gf/bf and then they start ignoring you,stop replying to your texts,and then disappear for a long time...Then they reappear again after many weeks or months.

I know this probably happens with a lot of people,but I just wanted to make a rant about it.
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Unread 05-27-2013, 09:50 PM   #5784
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Thinking back on some things, and I know I F'd some things up! Sort of hating myself right now, but can't change the past I really should have done something at the time, but nooooooooo. Life hates me sometimes...
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Unread 05-29-2013, 03:01 AM   #5785
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@funtomkitten: My birthday is coming up very soon too, and, for various reasons, it will most definitely not be my day. Put simply, my mother is mental. Okay, so she's not literally mental, but she has some mentionable issues that drag down my brother and I into an endless abyss of hopelessness. Yeah, my brother and I are cursed to live our teen years with one parent. My mother hasn't always been this bad, it's something that has slowly progressed over the past few years.

Number one: she thinks she has parasites living in her head. I am being completely serious. She's been convinced that worms or some shit have been burrowing tunnels through her head and because of that, she picks and digs into the sides of her head and scalp to find these non-existent beings. It'll be 3 years this November since she's been doing this. It's fucking gross, and she doesn't understand that we, her children, do not want to see her "specimens" lying on a piece of toilet paper on the bathroom sink.

Number two: she has no perception of time. The bane of her existence is to hinder her children from going places and doing things they want to do. It's always a mission to get her to drive to get groceries, clothes, school supplies, etc. This holds true especially for conventions. I always have to do the planning, I have to pack everything, etc. And of course, whatever it is that our family is attempting to attend, we are always late for everything. This is taking a major mental toll on me.

Okay, so this doesn't sound that bad; I'm just bad at explaining the issues my mother has. Even so, her behavioral routine is making me go insane. My self-esteem was already low to begin with but now, it's basically non-existent. She has made me the most negative person someone could possibly be which has intensified my social anxiety issues. She's forcing me to go away to college in a few months - she knows that my anxiety is horrible and she wants me to live in a dorm where social interaction plays a vital role. I can't and won't be able to handle it. My life fucking sucks now, and I'm worrying to death about what the near future holds for me.
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Unread 05-29-2013, 04:01 AM   #5786
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So, there's this guy, right? He's my frenemy in a way, although he is starting to be less of a frenemy and more of a genuine friend as I get to know him better, yet I still always have my guard up. I'll call him Kris. I like to think that Kris has good intentions, but doesn't always carry them out the best way and he ends up accidentally insulting or offending my other friends pretty often, which in turn makes me mad because they're mad, and you can see how this doesn't end well.

He and my boyfriend (who I will call Jack) do not see eye to eye at all. There's a lot of drama between them. I am almost 17 and Jack is 23. (Don't worry, he promises not to have any sexual contact with me until I'm 18, even though at 17 in my area I'm technically legal. He truly loves me and I love him.) I've had a lot of shit from my ex and my mom about him.

My ex sent me dozens, if not hundreds of guilt-tripping, harassing, and other hurtful messages to me about how Jack will only hurt me, never love me, is only going to use me, just wants sex, is a rapist/pedo, is otherwise a horrible person, how my feelings for him are bs, etc. I knew that he didn't know a thing about him so those were all things just pulled out of my ex's ass, but that doesn't mean it didn't still hurt to hear that about someone I love so much.)

My mom can't see past the age difference, and even though I have literally proved every argument she has ever held against not letting me be with Jack wrong, she still can't accept it. She won't let me see him anymore, but my dad is making me promise after my 17th birthday to tell her that we're official. I am terrified to, and have no idea how to approach her about it. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated. I just wish she could meet him and see him for the amazing guy he really is.

That, plus knowing that Jack puts up with a lot of people's bs, is often tread all over because he just wants to be nice to everyone, and has low self-esteem, equals me being very defensive when anyone says anything negative about him.

Right now, I don't think Kris knows for sure that I am dating Jack. But my friend told me that he knows that I have feelings for him, and that Kris is suspicious of Jack. At a convention earlier this year, Kris even told me not to let Jack try to date me. I also know that Kris has thought for a long time that he is a pedofile, even though Jack has proven time and again that he isn't into children. He knew that I liked him for a long time and liked me back, but for a couple months refused to officially go out with me because he thought I was a little too young.

Kris also for some reason thinks I look 10, when most people mistake me for being in my early 20's. So in Kris's mind, I'm an innocent 10-year-old being seduced by Jack the creepy pedo. He has made some...passive-aggressive comments about him to me. I know he's just looking out for me, but it still pisses me off greatly. I can only imagine the bitching Jack is going to get and the "WTF CLAIRE!?!?" messages I'm going to get from Kris when he sees our relationship status on our Facebooks once I turn 17.
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Unread 05-29-2013, 09:09 AM   #5787
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So what you're saying is Kris isn't your friend he's just an asshole that started following you around?

Yeah sounds about right.
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Unread 05-29-2013, 05:25 PM   #5788
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I'm sure most people have friends like this...I'm always happy to help my friends out if I'm able to, and I do it out of my own kindness. When you ask the same friend you helped though for something sooooooo small, they end up making it sound like a whole ordeal and end up not doing it anyways *sighs* Yet they still expect more from me afterwards...I really never ask for much from my friends, but pretty obvious that one of us sees our friendship as more important than the other person does :/ Well, that's too damn bad if they keep expecting more from me >

People are funny to me sometimes XD
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Unread 05-29-2013, 06:00 PM   #5789
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Hmm...how old were you and your boyfriend when you started going out?
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Unread 05-29-2013, 08:12 PM   #5790
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That's kind of a big age gap for how old you are. If he was 30 and you were 23, I don't think it'd be as bad, but you're in different places in life and it's a bit suspect that a guy that old wants to date somebody so young, to be totally frank with you.
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