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Unread 09-15-2012, 08:36 AM   #1
Aussie Cosplayer
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Posts: 260
need advice

I have this friend though I love her dearly shes starting to upset me , I do gothic Lolita been doing it for a year now she said she hated Lolita but now I've expanded to sweet Lolita and asking Lolita's who have been doing it for years shes suddenly into it and an expert on it she put down the girls who have been doing Lolita for years saying they know less then she dose and that we are getting ripped off if we pay more then 100 for a Lolita dress. I buy bodyline and about to buy a JSK.

She also criticizes me for spending money on decent cosplays and goes on how cheapest can be the best she also suddenly wants to cosplay all the characters I am about to do but she try to talk me out of doing them first she also blasts me if I try to do a character she likes saying Ill ruin the fandom for her but its ok for her to do the characters I like

Not sure what I should do
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Unread 09-15-2012, 09:40 AM   #2
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Although it must be annoying for her to suddenly decide on things, especially with cosplaying the same characters you want to do. But remind yourself that you both don't own the characters nor can change each others decisions. Do what YOU want to do, and completely ignore her tactics. If she can't handle that, that's her problem - she'll probably give up or get bored on ragging you and your friends once you stop giving a shit. If she's really that bad, you need to talk to her and tell her to calm her shit or the friendship is over.

That girl seems to have issues and one day she'll end up having no friends with that kind of attitude.
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Unread 09-15-2012, 10:20 AM   #3
Aussie Cosplayer
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thing is she tells me the charters designs are crap or not true to the game or some excuse so I wont cosplay them then she suddenly says shell cosplay them its like she wants to do them but wants to talk me out of doing them first.

Like for one character I am doing I found some concept art she bagged the crap out of it saying oh don't do that you'll get laughed out then when she think shes talked me out of it she added it to her list its like what the shes shorter then me but I am the same height as the said character and lot of people have commented I would look good as this charter yet she keeps saying I wont
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Unread 09-15-2012, 10:26 AM   #4
Eau de Decus
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To be blunt, she sounds like an asshole, not a friend. I'm not really sure how long you two have been friends, and if this new persona she's taken on is new, or just something that's manifested from an already obnoxious way of acting, but listen to what Steffi said.

Just keep doing what you like to do. If lolita is your thing, then keep on rocking it. However, you'll need to make your stance clear and tell her what she is doing is not okay and you're not going to tolerate it. If she can calm the hell down, great. If she's going to continue berating you for it and putting you down, kick her to the curb and keep doing what you enjoy.

Friends don't act this way.
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Unread 09-15-2012, 10:53 AM   #5
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Uhh, are you sure she is your friend? I mean, you might think of yourselves as friends (lot of people are doing the same mistakes) while she might be thinking like "we are people who know each other a little better". I mean, you'll "ruin the fandom"? That's something that ProudtobeanAsian (God forgive me for mentioning that troll's name here) would say, not a friend. Nobody can ruin a fandom. I've seen several bad cosplayers cosplay my fav characters, yet I still like them. So that's will be HER problem, not yours. (Although I doubt that any cosplayer, be that good or bad, would be able to stop somebody from loving a certain anime/character/etc. if they are true fans.) You must not let her stop you from what you would like to do.
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Unread 09-15-2012, 11:04 AM   #6
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^Take an orange, you need protection from the troll.

As for your friend, to herself..she may be trying to give her honest opinion and is trying to be helpful, but for anyone outside of her brain, it really sounds like she's meddling more. (Even the most simple of cosplays can be expensive. This is NOT a cheap hobby.) I would tell her to kindly back off, because you're doing these cosplays for yourself. It's your body, your fandom, your money, and your fun. Not her's... heaven help us all if we all went off the bitching from others. She's really not sounding like a very good friend, but IS sounding very threatened. It would do her and everyone else a nice favor if she grew up.
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Last edited by cactusmomma : 09-15-2012 at 11:07 AM.
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Unread 04-06-2013, 07:06 AM   #7
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shes still p to her tricks I won a award in 2009 for a midna cosplay ive since improved on midna now shes saying shes going to do midna just to beat me at being the best at the charater and she wants me never to enter any more competitions
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